Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris doesn't buy life insurance, life buys Chuck insurance.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a sidekick because he accidentally got in the way of a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole bottle of sleeping pills. He blinked
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CHUCK NORRIS IS AWESOME
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A nuclear Explosion is a Chuck Norris's average firecraker
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Giraffes did not exist........until Chuck Norris upper-cutted a horse.
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Chuck Norris is the reason Brett Farve finally retired
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The Captain has a little Chuck Norris in him.
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For every 1000 men killed, Chuck Norris gains one hair on his beard.
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When Chuck Norris plays Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2, he gets a Tactical Nuke with only using a flashbang
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Chuck Norris is 1/8 Cherokee. This has nothing to with his blood line. He ate an Indian... and a Jeep.
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Chuck Norris made the Monopoly man go to jail. He is still there.
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Chuck Norris can find negative square roots.
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The Grand Canyon wasn't made by erosion. Chuck Norris needed info. from a scorpion, round-house kicked it, and the shockwave split open the earth
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I beat up Chuck Norris, You should have seen what I did to his fist with my face.
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When Chuck Norris looks at himself at a mirror, there is no reflection. There can only be one Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to actually read/study U.S. history, he just makes it up or repeats David Barton's lies.
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There is a item that can defeat Chuck Norris, it hasn't been invented yet, and it won't ever be invented
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Chuck Norris once had an older brother who tried to play the, “Why are you hitting yourself?” game. This is why he is referred to in the past tense.
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Books used to be scribbles, then Chuck Norris and his awesomeness came.
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