Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris can drive 400 mph in a G-Whizz.
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Duke Nukem was originally supposed to look like Chuck Norris. However no video game character can even resemble Chuck. So they went with Arnold.
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Chuck Norris' power level is over 9000
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Chuck Noris does know why the chicken crossed the road, it was running from all the roundhouse kicks Chuck Norris was giving him .
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Chuck Norris' whereabouts were unknown from 1939-45, he was found walking around Hiroshima. saying "the last thing I knew was falling out of a plane"
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Chick Norris doesn't die, if he dies he re-spawns in a second.
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Only Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a cardboard box.
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Noone was told about the first person to ever go to mars. Because upon getting there it turns out Chuck Norris "beat" them there, Literally
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The ONLY reason there was never a "Godzilla vs. Chuck Norris" movie is because Godzilla could not stop peeing his pants out of fear
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Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc. The Black and Blueray.
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A single Chuck Norris fist in the ground makes the Earth spread into continents!
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Chuck Norris Is The First Man To Calculate The Speed Of Light By Going At The Speed Of Light!
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Chuck Norris' toilet paper is a roll of cheese grater.
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Kobe Bryant scored 81 points in 1 game, Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points in 1 game, Chuck norris scored 500 points......in 1 second
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The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea. Until it met Chuck Norris.
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris does hire bodyguards for..........................their protection.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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Chuck Norris rules majority.
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The only reason there are only five original Rocky movies is because Chuck Norris was the only guy left who wanted to fight Rocky in the sixth movie.
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In other news, Chuck Norris returns from vacationing in Pakistan...
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